Crap Daze

So I drove down to Falmouth to dog sit with the UVVA ARF.

I struggled to get into the house. Trying for about 15 minutes. Rang dog owner. Explained it was a brand new key cut and it needed a wiggle. Really! Eventually got in (not via wiggling, just via it randomly working) after about another 10 minutes effort, shoved bags by door and cup of tea.

Wanted to go for a walk on beach/lunch. Couldnt lock door for ages. After about 10 minutes got it locked.

Returned from beach/lunch. Couldn't open door. After about half an hour trying to get back in, broke the key.

Rang dog owner. Not back until late tomorrow night. Me and the UVVA ARF need to be back home before then.

Drove round Falmouth/Penryn looking for keycutters. Asders keycutters couldn't do it (ffs), the other keycutter was shut. Locksmith charging £280 + VAT (FFS).

Drove home.

10 hours driving.

No toothbrush.

Crap day.

Tell me abait your crap daze asap plz.

At 'ome all day with the wife and kids!

Farkin hell Goaters.

Puts things into perspective, etc.

Then me Father and Father in law came for tea!   

mouldyoldgoat wrote:

Then me Father and Father in law came for tea!   

Did the father-in-law have to come all the way from GSG....?

I bought a load (& litres) of paint last summer to do some painting. All I did was open the tub to look at the paint, as you do. Then life took over and I couldn't get on with the job until earlier last week, on Wednesday. I shifted furniture, rolled back carpet, covered the floor, got brushes ready, made a cup of tea and then opened the tub again. As I was opening it I noticed an increasingly foul, horrible smell. Then, lo & behold, there was said paint (Dulux) covered in a delicious looking mould. How did that happen? Should I simply take the top off & continue? No - I had visions of the walls sprouting its own fine covering of mould in a few weeks time. So it was off to darkest Cornwall - Liskeard - to the nearest d-i-y store. When I got there I discovered that it was still being rebuilt after a massive fire there many months ago!!! So it had to be further on to a place I loathe - Trago Mills. Here I bought 5 litres of paint (Leyland professional) and returned home too late to do any painting.

It still needs to be done. But I'm too afraid to start!

zyph wrote:

mouldyoldgoat wrote:

Then me Father and Father in law came for tea!   

Did the father-in-law have to come all the way from GSG....?

No, he now lives 5 minute walk from us. He is talking about moving back to St Mary Cray but I think he's only saying that to wind the wife up. She is ever hopeful!   

knecht wrote:

I bought a load (& litres) of paint last summer to do some painting. All I did was open the tub to look at the paint, as you do. Then life took over and I couldn't get on with the job until earlier last week, on Wednesday. I shifted furniture, rolled back carpet, covered the floor, got brushes ready, made a cup of tea and then opened the tub again. As I was opening it I noticed an increasingly foul, horrible smell. Then, lo & behold, there was said paint (Dulux) covered in a delicious looking mould. How did that happen? Should I simply take the top off & continue? No - I had visions of the walls sprouting its own fine covering of mould in a few weeks time. So it was off to darkest Cornwall - Liskeard - to the nearest d-i-y store. When I got there I discovered that it was still being rebuilt after a massive fire there many months ago!!! So it had to be further on to a place I loathe - Trago Mills. Here I bought 5 litres of paint (Leyland professional) and returned home too late to do any painting.

It still needs to be done. But I'm too afraid to start!

There's no mould inhibitor in interior emulsions paints, you can buy it and add it yourself though but in this case Knecht your paint is fukkered. You also took the lid off and by doing so you moved the paint from having a 'shelf life' to a 'pot life' and the pot life is a lot shorter than the shelf life. By adding air to the mix you commenced the chemical reaction of the paint and the drying process.

Emulsion paint does have quite a short shelf life because the chemicals separate (it's emulsified oils and pigments as well as driers, binders and thinners.) and the liquid gathers at the top along with the air that you introduced when removing the lid to create a lovely warm and humid atmosphere under plastic lids for the creation of life.

BTW the smell is the odour of the farts given off by the bacteria that are tucking into the pigments.

Congratulations, you're a father!

Here to help   

mouldyoldgoat wrote:

zyph wrote:

mouldyoldgoat wrote:

Then me Father and Father in law came for tea!   

Did the father-in-law have to come all the way from GSG....?

No, he now lives 5 minute walk from us. He is talking about moving back to St Mary Cray but I think he's only saying that to wind the wife up. She is ever hopeful!   

The Crays....iffy places even for Orpington.......Locks Bottom, Darrick Wood or Petts Wood.....but never the Ramsden.

PS.......always the GSG of course.

The family has lived in both St Mary and St Paul for years and they have moved out to the others as for GSG I think he banned from there!

mouldyoldgoat wrote:

The family has lived in both St Mary and St Paul for years and they have moved out to the others as for GSG I think he banned from there!

Not be thrown out of the Buff ?

Wtf is a gsg?

GSG.......Iggy....not for me to tell !!!

GOB wrote:

.......
There's no mould inhibitor in interior emulsions paints, you can buy it and add it yourself though but in this case Knecht your paint is fukkered. You also took the lid off and by doing so you moved the paint from having a 'shelf life' to a 'pot life' and the pot life is a lot shorter than the shelf life. By adding air to the mix you commenced the chemical reaction of the paint and the drying process.

Emulsion paint does have quite a short shelf life because the chemicals separate  (it's emulsified oils and pigments as well as driers, binders and thinners.) and the liquid gathers at the top along with the air that you introduced when removing the lid to create a lovely warm and humid atmosphere under plastic lids for the creation of life.

BTW the smell is the odour of the farts given off by the bacteria that are tucking into the pigments.

Congratulations, you're a father!

Here to help   

Bloody hell! Experts can be so boring! I would start this afternoon but after an early morning & then a morning spent with friends followed by a pint or two I might just have a stroll & then a nap. Far better than painting. I'll do it tomorrow.

Iggy wrote:

Wtf is a gsg?

GSG is Green Street Green (where my wife used to live before meeting me and moving to Berkshire), started out as a hamlet or village in Kent which is now considered part of Orpington.

zyph wrote:

mouldyoldgoat wrote:

The family has lived in both St Mary and St Paul for years and they have moved out to the others as for GSG I think he banned from there!

Not be thrown out of the Buff ?

I don't think he has ever been in there. He used to go to the Royal Oak.

I used to call him the Birdman of GSG because he kept hundreds of Budgies! I think the neighbours would have been pleased to see the back of them and their twittering.

knecht wrote:

GOB wrote:

.......
There's no mould inhibitor in interior emulsions paints, you can buy it and add it yourself though but in this case Knecht your paint is fukkered. You also took the lid off and by doing so you moved the paint from having a 'shelf life' to a 'pot life' and the pot life is a lot shorter than the shelf life. By adding air to the mix you commenced the chemical reaction of the paint and the drying process.

Emulsion paint does have quite a short shelf life because the chemicals separate  (it's emulsified oils and pigments as well as driers, binders and thinners.) and the liquid gathers at the top along with the air that you introduced when removing the lid to create a lovely warm and humid atmosphere under plastic lids for the creation of life.

BTW the smell is the odour of the farts given off by the bacteria that are tucking into the pigments.

Congratulations, you're a father!

Here to help   

Bloody hell! Experts can be so boring! I would start this afternoon but after an early morning & then a morning spent with friends followed by a pint or two I might just have a stroll & then a nap. Far better than painting. I'll do it tomorrow.

That's nothing, just don't get me going on Calcium Plumbate and micaceous iron oxide!

Iggy wrote:

Wtf is a gsg?

Wtf is UVVA ARF?

bjorn_yesterday wrote:

Iggy wrote:

Wtf is a gsg?

Wtf is UVVA ARF?

Say it at lad.

bjorn_yesterday wrote:

Iggy wrote:

Wtf is a gsg?

Wtf is UVVA ARF?

They were a semi feral Aussie land girl seconded to the RAF during the war I think?

Iggy wrote:

bjorn_yesterday wrote:

Iggy wrote:

Wtf is a gsg?

Wtf is UVVA ARF?

They were a semi feral Aussie land girl seconded to the RAF during the war I think?

Pull the other one......sounds more like 'her in doors' to me.

Yer mean, 'ER INDAWS